Facing My Giant

Reposting this from my homeschool blog because I think it's a significant story I should share with you all. {Warning: expect a long wordy post. Please don't get bored! This means a lot to me!}

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Last July, TMAs peer group activity for the month was a showing of the movie Facing the Giants. Facing the Giants is the story of Shiloh football coach, Grant Taylor, who is currently struggling with his football team and his personal life As the story progresses, Grant learns how to accept these struggles and put his complete faith in God. He shares this new philosophy with his football team, and they slowly make it to the Nationals against the much favored team, the Giants.

One of Grant's players is David Childers, who plays as their substitute kicker. At first, David is hesitant to join the football team because he considered himself more of a soccer player rather than a football player. After his father encouraged him to try out, he actually makes the team. However, he is still scared that he won't be able to make the team score during matches because he thinks he can't kick every far. His father, who is unable to walk, tells him not to mope around waiting for something to happen. He tells David that he should always put his complete faith in God whenever we are afraid, and something great will happen.

I couldn't help but feel incredibly inspired after watching the movie. It was a reminder that God has something great in store for me and that everything happening in my life right now, including all the struggles, is a part of his amazing plan. It also reminded me that if I put my complete trust in God, great things will happen.

Recently, I faced one of the biggest giants I have ever faced so far: an audition. I'm not talking about the kind of audition I experienced back in 2008 for Repertory Philippines' A Christmas Carol. I'm talking about a real audition, one that most theatre artists go through now, with all the readings and dance auditions. Last July 28 and 29, I experienced all of that.

I auditioned for Rep's Camp Rock. I was very excited because I haven't been involved in any theatre production for the last four years. I had simply missed the stage so much. I practiced and practiced for about a month with my voice teacher, Teacher Amy. I did everything I could to help me pass this audition.

Although I don't remember being nervous during the first weeks of practicing, I do remember having sudden urges of panic two weeks before the auditions. I remember not being able to sleep and praying to God to help me make it through the auditions.

When the day of the auditions finally arrived, I was swarmed with complete nervousness. What if I don't make it? What if they don't like me? What if I screw up while singing? These questions kept ringing and ringing in my head. I couldn't even eat a proper lunch before heading up to the Rep office!

Waiting for my turn to audition was even more nerve-wrecking. I had my audition song on repeat, so that I wouldn't miss any little detail while I was singing. SO many people turned up for the auditions and a lot of them were far older than me. Talk about scary?!

I was the 38th person to audition. I was all fidgety as I sat there waiting for my turn to enter the room. When they finally called me, I said softly, "This is for you God!" Somehow, when I entered the room, all my nervousness simply drifted away. I didn't feel anything at all. There were around seven people who were going to watch me do what I love: performing. I sang Brand New You from 13 the Musical. Tito Audie Gemora {I've worked with him in A Christmas Carol} cut me off before I even got to the part where I could show my vocal range. To my amazement, they asked if I could stay and wait for a while! My heart skipped a beat. This is it, I told myself. This is it.

They asked me to come back the next day for callbacks. This time, we were going to do readings (an activity where you read lines with partners) and dance auditions. I was pretty excited for the readings (getting to pretend to be another person is fun!) but I was freaking out over the dance auditions. You see, I'm not much of a dancer. I guess this was another giant I had to face.

The callbacks were fun. I wasn't in the production yet, but I was learning so much from the experience! I trusted that God would help me with the dancing, and you know what? He did! I was one of the girls who made it to the Top 40 out of the 260 people that auditioned! Such a blessing! God really works wonders! We were told we were to wait for any announcements on our final auditions where they would be assigning roles for us.

On July 31, however, I received an email saying I did not make it to the shortlist. I'm not going to lie, I cried my heart out when I broke the news to my mom. It just...hurt so badly. I had this one chance, this one AMAZING chance, and I simply just lost it. The email did say something that lifted up my spirits, "This is in NO way a reflection of your talent. You passed the callbacks, which says a lot about you."

My parents comforted me saying they were extremely proud of me, even though I didn't make it. Honestly? They made me cry even harder. My mom told me she was so amazed that a young girl like me actually had the guts to go through an extremely tedious audition like that. My dad said he was proud of me because out of the 260 people that auditioned, and at 13 years old, I was part of the top 40 passed the callbacks, and probably the youngest among them! I'd like to thank them right now {if they are reading this. Hi Mom! You most likely are} for sacrificing so much just so I could go out and experience my dream.

To my surprise, I recovered the day after. {My voice teacher was rather impressed with me. She said it would have taken her a week to get over rejection like that} I told myself, "You know what, Arielle? This isn't the end of God's plan for you. This is simply the beginning. You achieved something right here. You faced a giant that an ordinary thirteen-year-old couldn't." Right now, I can't wait for the next opportunity God gives me. Because you know what they say, "When God closes a door, He opens a window."